Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize