please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
