Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
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We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
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You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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