So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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