when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
