Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
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My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
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I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
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