normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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