I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize