whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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