Moan for me like Helen Keller
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
