Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
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