So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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