There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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