I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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