This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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