I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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