She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize