i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
