We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
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