If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
