Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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