quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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