dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize