Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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