Sponge bath it is.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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