fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
