when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
