They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
