My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
