i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees