Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!