you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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