no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
