I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
