Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
