i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.