You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize