tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
