I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
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My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
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Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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