Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
