his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
third nipple confirmed
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
