I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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