Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
