Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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