you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
