How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
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