used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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