Whod you bang
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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