I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Having a random hookup so left but love u
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
