my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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