Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
