I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
