the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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