Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
